So I was sitting getting some coffee at caribou coffee. It was a rather windy day.. well needless to say as I'm about 10 feet from my car I see something wizzing past my face...it was REALLY big. Then BAM it hit my car. A facking caribou coffee umbrella flew out of a table.....travelled about 75feet(I had to measure it for my statement), and hit my fking car. It broke my rear side marker(passesnger side). left 3 noticeable dents in the rear quarter panel, and left a NICE indented groove going all the way down......I dont know about you guys but whenever I drive my 7 I park ALL the way in the back in a corner....

To give you all an idea of a caribou coffee umbrella....it has a wingspawn the size of fking middle ages dragon, it has fangs that will chew through an engine block like its nothing. And it breaths fire equivalent to the temperature of the sun. Needless to say it weighs about 35lbs. When the wind of death coupled with a fearsome creature like a caribou coffee umbrella, nothing can escape!

So the knight of caribou(manager) never wanted to talk to me, I left him messages and messages. Then I found out he got demoted to just a shoe shiner(he quit 3 weeks after the incident). So I've been trying to get into contact with somone higher, so I go straight to caribou corporate(apparently they have never heard of the Umbrella of Doom). So I keep waiting, still going there for my morning afternoon and nite coffee, I chat it up with the new manager constantly trying to get a claim report done. I FINALLY DO IT!

Now 5 months later the claim has gone through, and they are going to send out insurance ppl out! My only problem is...if they repaint one side of my car...my car is gonna be 2 different colors! /sigh....remember watch out for the Umbrella of Doom!!

 

just put a dent on the other side so they have to panit that too :P

 

^+1

 

Hmmm, a thought I just had.

I key my car, hood to bumper and back around. I call cops and say I fould it that way and act very upset, almost in tears. I pay deductable, I get new paint job for 100 bucks.

Hold on a minute, I need to find my keys.......

 

And I wonder why my god damn premium is so high. Damn frauds.

 

Step down from the soap box bro, it was just a little joke and didn't require a negative feedback.

And just so you know, your premium is "so high" because insurance companies themselves are the frauds.

 

It's positive, bish. I didn't actually think you would carry out fraud after posting about it on a public forum.

 

Ah, my plan is working perfectly....they will never suspect a thing.


I mean, yeah, what you said.

 

fact: the temperature of the core of the sun is 15,000,000k

infact, if there was a 1mm bearing at that temp and you where 100miles away, it would burn you to a crisp.

*random facts over*

 

So like, would water boil at that temperature?

 

lol @ phil ><

BTW this REALLY did happen...I actually have the top piece of the umbrella sitting in my car with black mazda paint chips stuck in the wood....I wouldnt make something like this up...I did add my own twist tho, cuz I'm a huge dork =p