it was a cold morning. I walk to my car as usual to goto work. i smoke a cig before i opened the car door and sit down. fart and pick my nose a little while flicking the nuggets out the window. so i reach for my key with the beather filter attached to them and i stick the long hard key inside the tight holed ignition. turn the key and noise and beeps alarms and satan speak from the dashboard as all the lights on the idiot panal light up so i watch the lights amazed like it was a ufo about to dissappear but THEY STAY ON!!!! i turn the key and the car doesnt start but turns over and those lights from hell disappear. BUT as soon as i stop trying to turn the 1.3 litre powerplant the lights and satan come BACK to haunt me.

what should i do about this problem?

 

If this is your car from your avatar, I think I can see what the problem is, lol. Check grounds maybe? Are you saying that you cant start the car and the lights stay on until you start to try and start the car?

 

I'm don't know if the alternator is or is not the problem but with the engine shut off reading 12.3 is only reading the battery. Nothing to do with alternator while ignition is shut off. The alternator is only working while the engine is turning and the key is on.

 

Sounds like a dead or low battery and possible an alt failure (but mostly a dead battery).

That and your post is very hard to understand with you trying to sound cool.