So I got my car out today, before it rained here -Ohio- and I washed it, and then I waxed it twice, and then I armor-all'd the trim and bumpers, and then I rain-x'd the windows, and then I used some tire shine, and of course the wheels, targa band, etc. etc. (Im a little OBSESSIVE OKAY??!?!) But after the engine bay I get in my car, start cleaning the dash, when all of the sudden *Plop*.....

Its February
The Middle of winter
Colder than a witches tit
I just waxed my car.......


I looked up at my glass sunroof and there it was....







bird ****......

I told the little ******* next time they did it I was gonna use my shot gun. but that was last fall... Dont they migrate? or do a few of them stay around to strategically poop on unsuspecting freshly cleaned sports cars.... So I got out and cleaned it off *shudder* I just dont get it I cant win.... I swear I'm gonna shoot every bird in the tri state area.. Of course theres rain-x which just makes water bead off, and fog-x, why not ****-x or poop-x or anti-crap.

Has anyone ever seen that one commercial that aired years ago, where the birds are like fighter planes and they are chaseing one particular car just to **** on it? I think (not sure) it was a Nissan commercial.

Anyway, I really have nothing better to do than post this so humor me, Im old and tired and will be asleep soon, so you wont have to deal with me

but just wondering if bird poopie bothers you guys as much as it does me, Jeezus!! Its February!!! There are no birds in Ohio in February!!! AHHH! The little ******* are playing mind games with me!!!

 

I don't have a single tree in my yard, I like it that way. I don't have to rake leaves because they all belong to the neighbors and eventually they all blow back.

I usually make it an hour after a wash or wax before one of those Predator drones get me. One of these days I'll figure out how they manage to land them UNDER the bumper of my 2nd gen. I hate bending over any more.