Things Japanese people say
 

I'll start:

"I work 28 hours a day."

"My ancestors are Samurai."

Yes I am at that point where it stopped being interesting and cute, and actually got annoying. Please don't tell me that I'm the only one who hears these two statements every day.

My JTE's ancestors really were samurai.

'You're face is so small!'
'How tall are you?'
''How long have you been in Japan?'
'How long are you staying?'
'My, you're good at chopsticks/Japanese.'
'You've learned this much Japanese in 2.5 years in Japan!?!?!?'
'Do you have a girlfriend?' < no adult women ask this...
'Oh, that's an American Joke.'
'Why do you always wear sunglasses?'
'Why don't you use an umbrella?'
'Aren't you cold?' < NO, fuck off!

Lol. Do you guys get those question from random people, or coworkers? What do you currently do in Japan? If you got any stories, please share! I really want to visit Japan :]

But I really am a Samurai, no really!

That's like those guys who go on the Internet and claim to be a member of elite military units. Just admit it. You're a schmuck like the rest of us. Wearing a fake Rolex and telling ignorant foreigners that your grandfather was a Samurai just makes you a poser.

From what I've been told the reason Japanese people say that, besides every family having legends about their ancestors, is that they don't understand Japanese history. Before the meiji period, commoners didn't have a family registry. It was reserved for the samurai and royalty. So after the meiji restoration when commoners could own property etc they needed last names. Apparently they either just made a new family registry or people from the merchant class that had the money could buy an adoption into a samurai's family registry. So essentially every single Japanese person that has a last name can say that they are ancestors of a samurai, since nobody but royalty and samurai had last names before the meiji period. I don't know why people claim this like it's something cool. They either just don't know or don't care.

I may have been misinformed but it sounds a lot more likely than every single Japanese person I know telling me they are a Samurai. I'm going to start telling them that I am a Lord and Duke.

Here's some good reading and stories for you about Japan:
http://etd.fcla.edu/WF/WFE0000155/Je..._200905_MA.pdf

Just went to the grocery store. The guy asks me

"Do you Americans like Japanese girls?" *smiling wink wink*
Then he adds "You know I own a grocery store in China too and my wife is Chinese *smile wink wink*"
I really thought he was about to sell me his daughter along with the groceries.

She didn't use the word samurai, just "buke" which means samurai family. They actually have the paperword and a sword in storage. She's the 16th generation.

She didn't claim it all of the sudden...just mentioned it when I was talking about familys with sword and armor laying around.

"Haroe"
"This is a pen"
"My ..... (some relative) lives in ... (any country with white people)"
"Have you meet Michael Jordan,Jackson,...or any famous people"
"Dr.Pepper/ Cherry Coke tastes like chinese medicine" (I need to get me some of this medicine)
"Can you eat natto, nori, miso, sushi,....."
"why do you put your seatbelt on in the back seat" (this one has finally become a little less common but still pops up once in awhile)
"what is your blood type"

Some of the questions or comments I understand, just like no matter where I go it seems if I tell someone I am from California they automatically ask if I can surf.

Can you eat soba/horse/sansai/etc...

kids ask;

Do you have guns > hell yeah
How "tall" are you? > fuck off you little shit

Wow that's quite the read! I started reading it without realizing how long the book was. I'll have to ready it part by part. Thanks for sharing the book :]


Haha...did you actually tell them to f*** off? how did they react?!

No, and they wouldn't know what it meant anyway.

I went to a different grocery store today and this time it was a cashier girl instead of a sneering middle aged man. This girl has seen me before and I thinks he has a crush on me because she's always trying to talk with me and be cute. I guess I shouldn't be annoyed by that, but she just says the weirdest shit. Like today she said "You usually come at 7 o'clock but today you came at 5 o'clock. Usually 5 days a week you come at 7." It's a little weird but maybe she enjoys math?

So then I walk across the street to a different grocery store to buy something else. These two grocery stores compete by having some products expensive and some cheap so you end up shopping at both. Anyway there were more cashier girls and there's a new one. She's like 3'10, looks like she's about 8 years old and has her hair done in pig tails with tons of blush on her cheeks. I'm like wtf is this an anime or something? This girl is unreal. She didn't even actually speak to the customers. She just squeaked and giggled. It was like pedo paradise. It's just weird and makes me feel uncomfortable.

Buahahaha! Man I couldn't stop laughing. My parents just saw me laughing all by my self. I think they're starting to think I'm losing it or something. Does the sneering old man think you're a thief? Lol. The math girl, how would you rate her on the scale of 1-10? Seems like she pays attention to you. She's even got you down on a rough monthly schedule, stalker? Lol. How do you communicate with her? Oooo and describe her! Tanks :]

The loli girl sounds funny. Did she giggle around you?

In America, she'd be a 10, maybe 9 in Washington. In Japan she's like a 6 but I guess the fugly teeth might make it a 7. I talk in Japanese only. She looks Japanese. I didn't talk to loli girl.

The one thing a Japanese person has never mentioned is the crazy Japanese traditional toilets. Yes they have computers but they poop into a tray in the ground. It's weird.

It's supposed to be more hygienic, but I know how you feel. I'd hate to have explosive diarrhea and that's my only option.

To me, it's the bathroom version of air-to-air refueling + Operation! because if you touch the sides you'll get aids, but if you miss by even 1mm it'll probably go all down your pants and then you're fucked.

http://blogs.crikey.com.au/purepoiso...-operation.jpg

Hahaha. I never had to use one, but I'd go pants off for that reason.

Japanese style toilets suck. It's not that hard to do, but if you have a leg or knee injury you are fucked.

A 9 for Wa?!? Mandrake, are you saying we have lower standards? :lol:




You guys are talking about these toilets?

http://f00.inventorspot.com/images/f...ist_custom.jpg


Yea, I can't imagine how uncomfortable it is for somebody with an injury. Where do you see the American style toilets? I wonder which style the Japanese prefer....

I went to the public sports center today to use the gym. There was a pregnant Japanese woman on the treadmill! She had a nice beachball sized belly but no matter she was still fit. It was impressive.
There was some really old guys doing Japanese archery and actually hitting the targets too.

Then I found some bluefin at the grocery store and I was happy. I guess they really are going extinct because it's almost a rare occurrence to see it now and it's usually like $12 for 4 ounces! That's like a McDonalds hamburger patty sized piece.

Most newer buildings have Western-style toilets.
And usually public restrooms with Japanese-style will have at least one Western-style.

Everyone has their preference for one or the other though.

This is so cool

I wish I knew more Japanese. What am I looking at?

I have no idea but it's nerdy and cool as hell.

Haha. It does look intense.

It's the visual display for Japan's new anti-cyberattack defense system.